Addiction Quitting Advantages

 If you are addicted to illicit drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes, now might be the time to quit. You may find that your addiction has interfered with many aspects of your life, including not being as happy as you used to be, not being as successful as you could be, and generally not enjoying life.

Some people can be addicted to these substances and can still hold it together but, if this is not you, it is time to think about quitting. There are many advantages to quitting your addiction to drugs, alcohol, and cigarettes. This is the topic of this article.

Advantages of Quitting Illicit Drugs

Taking illicit drugs and being addicted to them can cause your life to feel all "upside down". You may be missing work or school, you may have health problems because of your use of drugs, and you may be having relationship difficulties because your significant other is unhappy with your drug use.

Here are some advantages to quitting illicit drugs:

• Your body will be healthier. Most illicit drugs are harmful to your body as most of these drugs are toxic to your system and you are better off without them. The exact adverse effects an illicit drug has on your body depends on the drug you are taking. For example, painkillers and heroin can block the action of the lungs ability to clear secretions, putting you at an increased risk of lung diseases, such as tuberculosis, lung abscesses, and pneumonia. If you are a marijuana user, you can have changes in your brain and mental status, causing symptoms of schizophrenia. Marijuana is also bad for your lungs. If you use methamphetamines, there are many adverse effects on your body, particularly on the brain and nervous system. You can suffer from malnutrition or weight loss when taking any illicit drug. By quitting your body will be healthier and you will have a better quality of life.

• You will have a decreased chance of dying. Many illicit drugs can cause you to die from taking them--even if it is your first time using the drug. Others have more long term adverse effects. If you are a cocaine user, for example, you can stress out your heart, leading to a heart attack or cardiac arrest. If you drink alcohol, you can suffer from alcohol poisoning and will have an increased risk of dying from a motor vehicle accident. Opioids can cause you to die from respiratory failure. Ecstasy and other synthetic drugs can overheat your body, causing a breakdown of your organ function. By quitting your addiction, you have the chance for a much happier and longer life.

• You will have better employment. Many people who are addicted to drugs lose their job due to absenteeism or poor productivity. While you may blame others for your failings, the problem really is your drug abuse. You are more likely to fail to complete tasks at work or make mistakes on the job when you are using. If you halt the addictive process, you will have a better chance at getting (and keeping) a good job.

• Your relationships will be better. If you are using and you have a spouse or family member who do not used drugs, there can be discord in the family and your relationship with your loved ones will suffer. Relationships have ended because of drug and alcohol abuse. If you live with a partner who also uses drugs, you may have problems with Child Protective Services (CPS) and may lose custody of your children. By quitting your addiction, you can be a better parent and can have better relationships with all of your loved ones.

• You will have fewer money problems. If you are addicted to drugs, much of your money goes to purchasing drugs. For example, if you are addicted to heroin, you may be putting out $150 to $200 USD per day in order to support your habit. Marijuana use can cost you thousands of dollars each year and addiction to prescription pain relievers is expensive. Cocaine use will cost you thousands of dollars per year as well. If you choose to stop your addiction, you will be able to have more money to spend on things you really want or need and will no longer have the money problems so common to drug addiction.

• You will feel emotions with more authenticity. Drugs blunt your ability to have genuine emotions. You won't feel the happiness or joy that comes from the pleasures in life. Drugs mask your true emotions when it comes to enjoying life events. If you use marijuana or opiates, you may feel overly mellow even when things are going poorly. Stimulants such as methamphetamine can cause you to feel delusional, blocking true emotions. When you use drugs over the long haul, you can become depressed and apathetic, especially when undergoing withdrawal. If you choose to overcome your addiction, you will be able to experience the wide range of emotions that will be available to you once you are no longer using.

• You will be more likeable. Many people who abuse drugs become aggressive and act mean toward their loved ones. You can have changes in your personality so that others will find you to be difficult to be around. If you overdose on your drug of choice, your friend will probably have to help you seek medical attention and they won't want to become your caretaker--looking after you to make sure you don't kill yourself because of your drug use. By quitting your addiction, your true personality will shine through, and both your family and friends will find you more likeable.

• You will stop engaging in a "dead end" activity. Addiction only leads to a poor quality of life, jail time, or death from health complications. The only way out of this is to become sober and quit your addiction. Think about attending a drug rehabilitation program that will help you achieve sobriety and will help you have a much better quality of life with a future to look forward to.

There are many reasons to quit using drugs--even more than listed above. If you need help stopping your addiction, see your doctor for a referral to a drug rehabilitation program and take the time to end your addiction before it ruins your life.

Advantages of Quitting Alcohol

Drinking is legal over the age of 21 and it is common among adults. The problem is that there are so many adverse effects to drinking--effects on your body, effects on your mind, effects on your relationships, and an increased risk of going to jail or becoming injured in a motor vehicle accident.

Here are some reasons why quitting alcohol can be advantageous:

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• You will have better physical fitness. Alcohol only provides you with empty calories and usually a lot of calories so you can easily gain weight. If you drink alcohol instead of exercising and St provide you with the nutrients you need to stay fit and live a healthier life. Binge drinking especially causes you to take in excess calories and weight gain can be a problem.

• You will have better metabolism. Alcohol depresses your metabolic rate and you'll gain weight from this. If you quit drinking your metabolism will improve and your muscles will recover faster from exercise.

• You will have more energy. Alcohol interferes with having a good night's sleep even though it is a depressant. By quitting drinking, you will sleep better and will have more energy during the daytime hours. This will increase your resilience and give you the energy it takes to enjoy your hobbies and to get some exercise.

• You will have fewer diseases. Alcohol contributes to more than 60 separate diseases, including hypertension, infections, damage to your nerves, malnutrition, and pancreatitis. You are also at a greater risk of getting various types of cancer if you drink, and you will have a greater risk for heart disease and brain disorders. Alcohol is a carcinogen, leading to a variety of cancers that can be avoided if you quit drinking.

• You will have a decrease in the chance of having dementia. Alcohol causes a shrinkage in your brain so that, if you use it over the long term, you have an increased risk of dementia as you get older. Alcohol can permanently damage your brain by disrupting the central nervous system (CNS). Alcohol can also cause damage to your nerves. All of this can be avoided by quitting drinking.

• You will have a decreased risk for type 2 diabetes. Alcohol contains a lot of sugar. Excess sugar intake can contribute to getting type 2 diabetes from the insulin resistance caused by high blood sugar levels. If you quit drinking, you will eat healthier and will have a more normal weight, which decreases your chances of having type 2 diabetes.

• You will have better liver function. Alcohol is metabolized by the liver and can lead to having a fatty liver and, ultimately, to developing liver cirrhosis. By quitting drinking, you will have improved liver function, even one month after stopping alcohol consumption.

• You will have a better immune system. Alcohol depresses the immune system, putting you at a greater risk for infections, including bacterial infections and viral infections, such as the common cold and flu. If you quit drinking, you will have an improvement in your immune system, affording you natural resistance to a variety of infectious diseases.

• Your fertility will be better. Alcohol impairs the ability of your body to product motile sperm (in men) or healthy eggs (in women). By quitting drinking, the egg and sperm will be healthier and you will have a better chance of getting pregnant and having a healthy pregnancy.

• Sex will be better. Alcohol can impair not only your sex drive but can interfere with your sexual performance. People who abuse alcohol have an increased risk of having multiple sex partners and are at a greater risk of sexually transmitted diseases. Quitting alcohol will allow you to fully enjoy sex and the sex will be healthier. If alcohol has led to impotence, this should resolve when you have had a chance to quit drinking.

• You will have better mental capacity. Alcohol can cause brain damage that can lead to poor cognitive abilities. When you quit drinking, you will be able to think better and will be able to form mental tasks better. Your memory will be better, too.

• You will generally feel better. Alcohol can cause damage to your emotions and can cause mood swings. You may have extremes in emotions and behavior when you use alcohol. Quitting drinking can help you get rid of the numb feeling that can occur when you drink alcohol and will be better able to manage your emotions.

• Your heart will be better. Alcohol contributes to heart disease. According to estimates, up to 2 percent of all heart attacks are related to the consumption of alcohol. Alcohol use can increase your blood pressure, which is also bad for your heart. There is a disease called "alcoholic cardiomyopathy", which is a weakening of the heart muscle caused by damage to the heart muscle from alcohol use.

• You will be less depressed. Alcohol is a depressant and using too much of the substance can lead to clinical depression. If you quit alcohol, you will have less of a depressant effect on the brain and your mood will improve.

• You will be more sociable. Alcohol may lower your social inhibitions but it can increase mood swings and make you more argumentative. You may say things to others that you will later regret. If you quit drinking, you can enjoy a better social life with relationships that are genuine and that aren't based on alcohol consumption.

There are many more reasons to give up drinking alcohol. If you are addicted to alcohol, get help through an alcohol treatment program or begin attending Alcoholics Anonymous or another 12-step program. Your health depends on staying sober and getting your life back together.

Advantages to Quitting Smoking

The advantages to quitting smoking are numerous and depend on how long it has been since you had your last cigarette or another tobacco product. You can have advantages to quitting smoking that start within 20 minutes of quitting; many of these advantages will last a lifetime if you continue to be a nonsmoker. The major advantages to quitting smoking include the following:

• Twenty minutes after quitting. The benefits of stopping smoking are almost instantaneous. If you can even quit for 20 minutes, you can have a return to a normal heart rate and will have a decreased chance of cardiovascular disease.

• Two hours after quitting. If you can refrain from smoking for just two hours, your heart rate will normalize and your blood pressure will go down. You will have an improvement in your blood circulation. You may feel an increase in warmth of your toes and fingers even after quitting for just 2 hours. Unfortunately, you may have nicotine withdrawal symptoms, such as increased appetite, sleepiness, insomnia, increased tension, anxiety, and cravings to smoke again.

• Twelve hours after quitting. Smoking can cause a buildup of carbon monoxide in your body as this comes from the tobacco smoke. If you quit smoking for just twelve hours, you will begin to release the carbon monoxide from your red blood cells and will have better oxygenation. Your carbon monoxide levels will return to normal even twelve hours after quitting smoking.

• Twenty-Four hours after quitting. You will have an increased risk of heart disease if you smoke, in fact, the risk is 70 percent higher if you are a smoker when compared to nonsmokers. Even twenty-four hours after quitting, you will already have a decreased risk for cardiovascular disease and will have a decreased chance of having a heart attack.

• Forty-Eight hours after quitting. Smoking decreases your sense of taste and smell. After you have quit smoking for just 48 hours, you will have an increase in taste and smell; you will enjoy your meals to a greater degree.

• Three days after quitting. Three days after quitting smoking will cause the nicotine levels in your body to return to zero. This means that you may have a bad case of nicotine withdrawal. Some symptoms of nicotine withdrawal include depression, irritability, anxiety, sweating, cramping, nausea, and headaches. You may be at your weakest point during this time as the symptoms may feel intolerable. This is when you can reward yourself with something that will motivate you to remain a nonsmoker.

• Two to three weeks after quitting. Your exercise tolerance will increase even after quitting smoking for just 2-3 weeks. Your body will begin to heal and your heart and circulation will improve. Your lungs may be clearer so you can breathe better during exercise. Your withdrawal symptoms will be less by this time.

• One to nine months after quitting. After just a month without smoking cigarettes, the cilia that move mucus from your lungs will repair themselves. This helps you fight off infections and allow for mucus to pass out of the lungs. If you had a cough from smoking, this will likely go away as will your shortness of breath. You should have no withdrawal symptoms by this time.

• One year after quitting. If you can quit smoking for an entire year, your risk for cardiovascular disease will be 50 percent less than if you continued to smoke. Quitting smoking can help prevent heart attacks.

• Five years after quitting. After five years not smoking, you will have the same risk of having a stroke when compared to nonsmokers.

• Ten years after quitting. If you had continued to smoke, you would have had a greater risk of certain cancers, such as pancreatic cancer, kidney cancer, lung cancer, esophageal cancer, throat cancer, and mouth cancer. Now that you don't smoke, your risk of getting these cancers will decrease. You will still have a greater risk of lung cancer but your risk will be cut in half.

• Fifteen years after quitting. If you manage to stop smoking for fifteen years, you will have a normal risk for cardiovascular disease and will have the same chance of having a heart attack as a nonsmoker.

• Long term benefits of quitting. There are many long term benefits of quitting smoking. You can increase your life expectancy to near normal ranges. According to the CDC, nonsmokers will live ten years longer than people who smoke. If you quit smoking, you can lengthen your life to nearly that of someone who has never smoked.

How to Boost Your Confidence by Controlling Your Negative and Positive Thoughts

 The Effects of Negative and Positive Thoughts

 

Positive thinking is a term that is used frequently these days, especially by those in the various fields of healing. It turns out that the idea of positive thinking is actually a very powerful tool for healing and for improving the quality of life in every way, and that fact has permeated the awareness of doctors all over the world. From cancer to mental health, the field of conventional medicine now takes into account the power of positive thinking. Alternative medicine and energy medicine have deep roots in this idea, as well.

If you are a television watcher, you know that negative messages constantly remind us how very frightening and violent the world is. Poverty, hunger, and pain seem to pervade the universe. Imagine this possibility: Within your own small universe, everything is fine! Yes, perhaps the world is a mess, but in the silent zone of your consciousness, you are fine. In that deepest sector of who you are, you have no insecurities or fears, but only joy and peace. Sounds unlikely?

Breathing out the negative: If you begin to practice your affirmations in a state of meditation, imagine how much more deeply they might travel into your subconscious mind.

Here is a simple method to help you enter into a meditative state. You can read and remember this method, or you can repeat it onto a tape and replay it for yourself to guide you through the process.

 

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. Plato

Exercise: Decide which affirmations you will focus on. Sit upright in a comfortable chair, with your head and spine straight, but relaxed. Take three very deep breaths, exhaling slowly.

©Starting with the tips of your toes, place your consciousness into each part of your body, silently telling each part, one by one, to relax. Your body will obey you instantly. Move up from your toes through your feet, up your legs, thighs, hips, back shoulders, neck, mouth, tongue, and finally all your facial muscles and head.

 

Once you are in this very relaxed state, notice your inhalation and exhalation.

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As you inhale, repeat, silently or aloud, your affirmation, visualizing and incorporating it into your cells. When you exhale each time, allow any related negativity that may arise to release and flow back into the ethers.

 

Allow yourself at least 20 minutes for this. When wayward thoughts and distracting noises occur, accept them and let them float on through, staying focused on your affirmations and exhaling negativity.

 

When you are ready, thank the universe and return your consciousness to the room.

 

There is a strong link between the negative conclusions you made about yourself as a child, and the problems you now experience with your confidence. Again, you do not need to recall the events that created negative thoughts about yourself. You just need to remember that you can replace that negativity with your affirmations, and doing so in a meditative state only increases your power.

If you feed the negative, your life will reflect more of the same problems and issues. If you replace the negative by feeding the positive, through affirmations, your life will begin to reflect that. Positive thinking has everything to do with confidence.

Meditation: Meditation can be a very powerful force for people who are working on confidence building. We encourage you to take up meditation as a life practice because it enhances every aspect of life and is particularly powerful when we are trying to make changes. The exercise here is a start. If meditation appeals to you, there are hundreds of books, seminars, workshops, videos, and other materials available to help you make mediation a way of life.

There are many paths to emotional freedom. What we strive for when we are working on building confidence is the freedom to be exactly who we are, to know who we are, and to be happy and comfortable with that. There are other ways in which we have blocked our growth that can be overcome.

Forgiveness: Now studied at the clinical level in energy medicine, forgiveness, or lack thereof, is a huge element that affects our well-being and confidence. Having an inability or unwillingness to forgive others is a large, black package that we carry in our psyches. Entire courses have been developed to help people forgive as a path to mental and physical health. Why is forgiveness such a primary issue?

In many instances, people truly have been violated and victimized through absolutely no fault of their own. Finding it in your heart to forgive someone who has inflicted severe damage upon us or upon a friend or family member is a tall order. We often hang onto our grudges simply because our hatred and anger glues the grudges to us, and they become a fixed part of our personalities. However, we can let them go.

Anger, resentment, bitterness, and animosity are all exceedingly negative forces. Negativity embedded in our consciousness affects our confidence and, in turn, affects the experiences and events in our lives.

Forgiveness can start small. If you hold a grudge against someone at work, for instance, start with that. Develop an affirmation such as, "I now release any negativity and anger toward Joe. I honor him as an equal and fully accept him as he is." Visualize what it would be like to have these feelings cleared. Meditate with your affirmation. Watch what happens with Joe.

Forgiveness squared: Perhaps the most daunting act of forgiveness is when we decide to forgive ourselves. We all make mistakes, act out of anger or fear, and do things of which we are ultimately not proud. Perhaps the largest black package we can carry in our psyches is that of self-loathing, guilt, and self-blame. How in the world can we dissolve this negativity?

Affirmations, meditation, and self-reflection will help tremendously. There are various forms of energy medicine, including meridian tapping and mirror gazing, that actually will dispel this darkness. However, for a moment, consider this:

Every single thing in your entire life that you have done, thought, felt, and experienced, negative and positive, has woven an intricate tapestry that is your life, and every thread in that fabric has led you to where you are at this exact moment.

 

If you have decided to work on your confidence through this article, consider that you might not be taking this step if even one of those threads were missing. If you can view your past experiences, even the negative ones, as part of the woven process of life and learning, you will more easily be able to forgive others and yourself. In other words, everything contributes to what we have come here to learn.

Embracing this idea can eventually lead to gratitude and forgiveness because you believe your enemies and wrongdoers have been only an integral part of your tapestry, and have truly contributed to the beauty of your life by showing you the lessons you need to learn. Perhaps you cannot adopt this philosophy readily, but once the image is in your mind, you may begin to see small truths that validate it.

FOUNDATIONS OF CONFIDENCE

Love: The most important lesson involves the truest and deepest roots of self-confidence. If self-confidence were to be distilled into specific characteristics, the dominant traits would be compassion and love. Love shows itself in many forms, such as helping, teaching, giving, green-living, charity, humility, and faith. However, the foundation of love and compassion can only be the love we hold for ourselves.

The idea that self-love calls for forgiveness of all past mistakes, for that is all they are, frees us from judging ourselves based on failures. Self-love does not depend upon your successes or failures. It relies on the inner-knowledge that you are on a path to learn and overcome your shortcomings, and you are doing just that. We all are presented with the exact appropriate challenges that will help us overcome the weak areas in our lives. There is no blame, unless you feed it.

Gratitude: The first step toward loving yourself is gratitude for even the smallest things in life. You may need to start small if you are at the end of your rope in some respect, but consider all the gifts of life, such as family, our five senses, and our ability to create. The abundance of life is present even for the most unfortunate person. Love every part of yourself, everything about yourself. Love your flaws and know that you can heal them. Love your mistakes and know that they are all part of your life lessons. Love the earth that gives us life. Love others, to whom we are all totally connected energetically. For each of these, you can create an affirmation to begin the process of gratitude. It is a lasting and rich way to live, and you never will regret the time you spend on learning gratitude and self-love.

Compassion

Sometimes actions come before feelings. That is, sometimes you have to put one foot in front of the other and do the action first, whether you are "feelin' it" or not.

A commonly cited example is the practice of forcing a smile. This is a well-studied phenomenon: If you make yourself smile, eventually you begin to feel better. In the case of self-confidence, a critical step in the right direction is finding a way to be of help to someone else. Whether you volunteer at a nursing home, help a disadvantaged child, give some time to the animal shelter, or mow your grandmother's lawn, giving is the most potent booster of self-esteem. If you already are a nurse or teacher, you may feel you are giving all day. However, giving without any strings attached, without the need to tell anyone or receive compensation, is true giving.

Integrity: There are many levels of integrity, the first one involving being true to oneself and acting in accordance with what we know is right and true. Integrity in our dealings with the world also has a major effect on self-confidence. Each time we do something inconsiderate, dishonest, demeaning, hurtful, or otherwise out of balance with our beliefs, the act sticks to us in the form of subconscious negativity. All negativity erodes self-confidence. Monitor your day occasionally, and give your integrity a checkup.

Humor: Everyone knows it is important to laugh. It heals our physical and mental ailments and lightens the burdens of daily life. Perhaps most importantly, it is crucial to be able to laugh at ourselves. Everyone stumbles; everyone is the occasional fool.

 

Everyone: Everyone lacks knowledge in some area. Everyone has physical flaws. Everyone experiences failure. If you can get tongue-tied in a formal meeting and laugh about it, you are miles ahead in self-confidence. Sometimes it takes time to see the humor of a distressing situation, but the more you practice doing so, the easier it gets. When humor permeates your daily life, you not only are more confident but extremely more likable.

Consideration: Every single person either has fears and confidence failures, has had them in the past, or will in the future. When you realize that we are all the same at some level, it is easier to allow a sense of ease and openness when dealing with other people. Knowing that others suffer from the same worries and fears and always treating them with consideration will do wonders for self-esteem. If we try to treat others with interest, respect, and deference when possible, it does not create vulnerability in ourselves but strengthens our character.

Beauty: Music, dance, singing, flowers, birds, trees, water in all forms, animals, and clouds all make an endless list of beautiful things. If you do not see the astonishing beauty in the world, it is time to step outside of yourself and go to an opera or art gallery, sit with Mother Nature, study a flower, smell the ocean air, or sing a song; in other words, study beauty. It is everywhere. It will lift up your soul. You will eventually notice your own beauty and that of others.

Study these character traits and others that you want as part of your personality. Step over the trepidation and intimidations, be what you want yourself to be, and watch your confidence grow.

 

The Role of Mindfulness in Battling Addiction

 Emotions can run wild, both when you are abusing drugs, alcohol, or tobacco. Things can really get out of hand when you are trying to get off these substances. Even so, giving up your addiction is an important thing to do, even though it isn't usually enough to provide you with the happiness you thought would be there after you quit using.

The upsurge of emotions when trying to quit drugs, alcohol, or tobacco is because there was a reason you became addicted in the first place and these reasons don't go away once you give up your drug of choice. Inability to deal with their emotions is one of the most common reasons why people turn to using substances and, even if you quit, you may have a lack of emotional intelligence that will still be there after quitting.

What is Emotional Intelligence?

The definition of "emotional intelligence" is that it is the ability of the addict, alcohol abuser, or tobacco abuser to control and assess their own emotions--both their own emotions and that of others. Emotional intelligence is measured using the EQ (which stands for emotional quotient), which like your IQ but is a different type of measurement as it measures different aspects of a person.

Overcoming Emotions in Drug Addiction

One of the most common problems for addicts is that they have problems coping with their emotions. In actuality, there is an overlap between alexithymia and drug addiction. Alexithymia is a medical problem where a person is unable to express their emotions through the use of language. The term "alexithymia" is Greek, meaning "without words".

Because drug users often suffer from alexithymia, they tend to self-medicate with drugs. They have a lack of emotional intelligence (EQ), which leads them to develop a drug addiction. Even if the individual becomes free of drugs, they can still have problems with their emotions and need to develop their EQ in order to remain drug-free.

What is required for emotional intelligence?

There are a number of skills necessary to have emotional intelligence. Some of these include the following:

• The ability to control feelings, behaviors, and impulses. This is called having the "ability to self-manage".

• Having good skills in relationships so that they can communicate effectively and build positive relationships.

• The ability to understand the needs and emotions of other people--a skill known as "social awareness".

• The ability to recognize one's own emotions and understand how this can affect behavior and thoughts. This is referred to as having "self-awareness".

To have a good emotional intelligence, a person needs the following:

• The ability to use humor when handling life's difficulties

• The development of the ability to deal with non-verbal communication

• The ability to resolve conflicts with positive outcomes

• The ability to lessen the individual's stress levels

• The ability to manage emotions--and recognize them when they occur

Emotional Intelligence in Sobriety

When you give up drugs, you will become sober in the physical sense but this may not be what is necessary to be happy. This is because you will continue to be expected to handle your emotions and must do so without using drugs. In order to truly recover from drug addiction, you need to become sober in the emotional sense. This can take a long time but will lead to you being happier in all aspects of your life.

How can you develop your EQ after quitting Drugs?

It is possible to develop your emotional intelligence after you quit using drugs. Here are some ways you can accomplish this:

• Find effective ways to handle stress. Once you know that you are dealing with stress, you need to handle this. There are many ways of doing this. You can try relaxation techniques, exercise, talking to others, or spend some time outdoors in order to deal with stress.

• Learn ways of recognizing stress. You may be under stress so often that you can't recognize what you're going through. This is problematic because you may be suffering from the consequences of stress without knowing it. Common symptoms of stress include having a lack of energy, feelings of anxiousness, depression, feeling antsy, feeling frustrated, having a decreased libido, negative thinking, increasing irritability, decreased appetite, a poor immune system, insomnia, muscular tension, unexplained physical symptoms, regular headaches, upset stomach, and an inability to think clearly.

• Increase your ability to listen. You need to learn how to listen as this is a vital skill if you want to have emotional intelligence. If you are self-obsessed, you will only pretend to be listening and won't actually have the skills to fully listen to others. Listening involves focusing on the other person's words fully and completely. You also need to give the other person time to say what they want to tell you. If you tend to interrupt other people, you need to try and count for five seconds after the person has finished speaking before you say anything back to them.

• Learn to be empathetic to others. Empathy is the ability to understand and identify with another's situation. This is different from sympathy because, in empathy, you make the attempt to understand the other person's perspective rather than feeling sorry for the person. Being empathetic is a skill you need to learn. You need to use your own imagination so you can understand the other person and understand their perspective. Even if you think the other person is wrong, recognize that they may have a good reason for their actions. Empathy leads to greater understanding of the needs of others and to the other person feeling as though they are being heard.

• Understand nonverbal communication. Communication is more than just hearing the words of others. You can learn a lot about another person by recognizing their body language. This is what non-verbal communication is all about. If you fail to understand the other person's body language, you may miss out on vital information the person is trying to convey. You may recognize more from the person's body language than from what they are saying.

• Develop skills in conflict resolution. The ability to handle conflict is crucial. People often have competing desires and needs so that conflict is often unavoidable. If you are not skilled in conflict resolution, you may find yourself arguing with others often and having bad feelings toward others. By learning conflict resolution, you can become a better person after you become drug-free.

• Learn to recognize your and other's emotions. Recognizing emotions is another thing that people who are addicted to drugs have problems with. This is why some people use drugs or overeat. They mistake feelings of boredom and fatigue with the need to use drugs or the need to overeat. When you can recognize your own emotions and those of others, you can experience a better emotional quotient.

• Self-understanding and mindfulness meditation. This is a technique used to help people better understand their internal milieu. When you are mindful, you become better able to identify your emotions but you can better manage them. Mindfulness involves learning how to full accept what is happening and living in the moment instead of on past traumas and other difficulties. You will learn, through mindfulness, that emotions are transitory and not that difficult to deal with.

• Find humor in situations that are difficult. If you can see the lighter side of life, you will have a better EQ. Humor is both effective for the addict but can also help others who are coping with a difficult problem. You don't need to make a joke out of everything but, if you can appreciate that even difficult situations have a humorous element, your EQ will be better.

  Interested in learning more? Why not take an online class in Understanding Addictions?

• Be willing to face life on its own terms. In order to have a reasonable EQ, you need to be able to face life as it comes. This means not finding the easy way out or running away from difficult situations. The obstacles you face in life are there to help you grow and develop. By overcoming challenges in your path, you are forced to develop coping strategies that will improve your EQ. Eventually, you achieve emotional sobriety and life becomes easier.

Overcoming Emotions in Alcohol Recovery

Dealing with difficult emotions often leads people to turn to alcohol. There can be emotions that result in damage to your recovery from alcohol. You ae often on an emotional rollercoaster, particularly when first stopping drinking. You may experience moods swings that only settle down after you have been sober from alcohol for several months. Some even have difficulty overcoming emotions several years after becoming sober.

Coping with your emotions can be difficult in alcohol recovery. If you can't cope with your emotions, you can jeopardize your sobriety. Emotions that often lead to the most difficulty in sobriety include the following:

• Excessive joy (pink cloud syndrome)

• Boredom

• Guilt

• Disappointment

• Fearfulness

• Anger

• Loneliness

The Difference between Feelings and Emotions

May people use these terms interchangeably, although technically these two words are different. Emotions represent a "state of feeling" that comes out of something that is happening in the present or something that has traumatized you in the past. Emotions can involve many feelings. For example, love is an emotion that comes out of trust and joy.

The Danger to being Lonely in the Recovery Process

You need to recognize that there is a difference between feeling lonely and being alone. You can be standing in the midst of a crowded room and may still feel lonely. Loneliness is the experience involving intense feelings of emptiness and solitude. We, as humans, are generally very social so that, in stopping alcohol use, you may have difficulty with loneliness, especially if drinking helped you to be more social.

Giving up alcohol can mean you are walking away from your friends who continue to use alcohol. This is because you shouldn't be around your former drinking buddies after you have become sober. This can lead to intense loneliness that can get in the way of recovery. The best way around this is to develop a new social network and is something that can be accomplished by joining groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous or by finding friends who do not drink.

Resentment and Anger can lead to Relapse

Being angry is one of the most dangerous things you can do when you first stop drinking. It is dangerous because you can't think straight when you are angry. You can fall into the trap of doing things you'll later regret. While it is normal to be irritated from time to time, recovery from alcohol abuse means being cautious not to be angry so much.

One of the emotions that leads to anger is resentment. You feel resentment when you feel that someone has wronged you in some way. These wrongs can be imagined or real. People in recovery can be resentful if you feel as though your efforts are not appreciated by others or if you feel as though others are getting in the way of your recovery. This can cause self-destructive thoughts that can interfere with sobriety and can lead to relapse. Resentment can fuel anger and, if you hope to be successful as a former alcoholic, you need to overcome this emotion.

Fearing the Future

Fearing the future keeps you trapped in the addictive process and it can prevent you from progressing in your recovery. Common things people feel fearful about in recovery include the following:

• Fearing that you won't be happy in recovery

• Having a fear of relationship problems

• Having a fear of poor health

• Having a fear of dying

• Having fears about how to remain sober indefinitely

• Having fears of financial problems

The main thing you want to know about fear is that it involves worrying about things that have not yet happened or may never happen in the future. This means that you need to let go of the future. It involves having faith that the future will be brighter. It means that you must believe you are doing the best you can to remain sober. Fear can be devastating to a person in recovery and can lead to emotional paralysis so that you don't take the actions necessary for success in recovery.

Disappointment by Expecting too much out of Sobriety

It is natural to expect an improvement in your life after quitting alcohol. This is justified but the main problem occurs when you expect everything to be perfect as soon as you are sober. You fail to recognize the first axiom of recovery and that is that "recovery is a process and not an event". It can take years to rebuild your life after you become sober to the point where you feel as though you are happy most of the time. You will always need to improve as you recover from alcohol.

Achieving sobriety means that your life will significantly improve. If your expectations are unrealistic, however, it can easily lead to disappointment. When you are newly sober, you may begin to question your ability to remain that way. You can feel cheated because living sober isn't as fun as you thought it would be. You may not be willing to put in the necessary work to build the life you have dreamt about in the first place.

Guilt can be Dangerous

Guilt can be an extremely self-destructive when you are in alcohol recovery. You should feel remorse over things you may have done while using alcohol but being guilty is of no use to you. The only function guilt has is that it becomes an excuse to return to drinking again.

It isn't possible to change the past so the best you can do is maintain a focus on the future. If you stay away from guilt, you will be able to better make amends to those you have harmed as a result of your drinking behavior. If you joint a 12-step group, you will be asked to take a personal inventory of those things you did while you were drinking and make amends for those things that were harmful to you or others. This can help you handle your guilt in a healthier way.

Boredom in Recovery from Alcohol Abuse

One of the reasons why you drink, particularly in the beginning is that you feel bored with your life. When you feel bored, you don't find anything interesting in your surroundings. This is a bad mind frame to be in but is something you may feel on occasion. Those who experience too much boredom may find life less satisfying. This causes all sorts of negative thinking. You may begin to think of your drinking years as a time of more excitement than you are experiencing in recovery.

If you give up drinking, you will find that you have more time on your hands. This is because, in the past, you spent a lot of time thinking about drinking. When you become free of alcohol, there will be huge lapses in time where you feel you have nothing to do. This is why it is crucial to find new things to do so you don't experience as much boredom. Fortunately, most alcoholics eventually feel as though they don't have the time to do the things they want to do.

Coping with Emotions in Alcohol Recovery

You can do a number of things that will help you better handle difficult emotions that come up as a result of being newly sober. Here are some options:

• Join an AA group so that you have others to share your emotions with

• Attend therapy in order handle difficult emotions

• Journal in order to have better clarity around your emotions

• Practice mindfulness meditation techniques

• Learn strategies for coping with negative emotions like guilt and anger

Overcoming Emotions in Smoking Cessation

There are many emotions that come up when you are trying to quit smoking. You may go through a grieving process now that you aren't smoking cigarettes or using alcohol. There are five stages of this type of grieving process, including the following:

1. Denial

2. Anger

3. Bargaining

4. Depression

5. Acceptance

You will likely go through these things as part of your recovery from smoking addiction.

In denial, you may feel disbelief around your tobacco abuse. You may feel as though things aren't really happening to you. After this, you may feel angry. You may wonder why you are going through this process and take out your anger on others. After this comes bargaining. You may try to repent for those things you did while you were a smoker. Eventually, you become depressed and may feel like using cigarettes again. You may isolate yourself from others and may mourn your loss of cigarettes or other tobacco products. Eventually, you learn to accept yourself and your new role as a nonsmoker.

How to Cope with Emotions without Smoking

While stress is a normal aspect of life and can help your reach your goals (if you have mild to moderate stress), extreme stress can lead to problems with relapsing into smoking or using tobacco again. Managing this stress is crucial to being able to quit smoking. Some people who smoke feel as though the only way to deal with stress and having negative emotions is by smoking again.

You may have used smoking to deal with stress. Fortunately, there are ways of handling stress without smoking. Here are a few tips you can put into practice in order to cope with emotions without smoking:

• Visualize. Find a place to think about where you feel relaxed, comfortable, and safe. See it as clearly as possible, including using all your senses. Allow yourself to be there for a while until you feel better.

• Breathe. Take some slow and deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. You will feel your body beginning to relax.

• Relax. You can hold onto tension and stress in your body. Try to determine who stress is affecting your body and identify where you are feeling tension. Find ways to reduce your tension so that you can decrease your stress levels. Try stretching, having a massage, or taking a warm bath.

• Exercise. Exercising releases endogenous endorphins--neurochemicals that help you feel better and help reduce your levels of stress. Try walking as a means to reduce stress.

• Focus. Being a non-smoker can be overwhelming at times. Try not to worry too much about the future and instead focus on the present day and what you will do to overcome smoking today.

• Talk with others. Try to share how you are feeling with family, friends, your clergy person, or your therapies. Talk to those who support your decision to be smoke-free.

• Decrease caffeine. Caffeine can help you remain awake but it can also lead to feelings of tension, jitteriness, and stressfulness. Cutting back on caffeine will reduce your stress levels. Try herbal tea or hot water with a lemon wedge so you can drink something without caffeine in it.

• Take care of yourself. This may take extra effort but is worth it. Try doing basic things like getting plenty of sleep, drinking a lot of water, and eating a healthy diet.

• Accept yourself. Life as a nonsmoker is sometimes unpredictable. There will always be some stress in your life, even after you quit smoking. Remember that there will be good days and bad days, even when you don't smoke.